wow, i just published that last post, and all of a sudden i found the long post i had lost last week. i guess it wasn't QUITE as long as i thought it had been, but it had felt long at the time. I am glad i found it.

I love writing. I think most people have lost the art of writing. With internet, chat rooms, "voice command," and cell phones
with txt messaging, hardly
anyone truly writes to each other.
it is such an art form i think. I love getting hand'written letters from people who are close to me, or from someone i haven't heard from in so long. hmm... i think maybe i will write some letters to people. But not right now. Maybe when i am in a better mood...which had better come soon!

11Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality

I Thess 5:16-17 Be joyful always; pray continually...

Psalm 25:4-6
Show me your ways, O LORD,
teach me your paths;
guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.
Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love,
for they are from of old.

This is a really cool, kinda creepy picture. I was intrigued by it though, so i thought i would put it on here. Except for the creepiness of the eyes, it almost reflects how i have been feeling. Somewhat blank, and blah-zae! (or however you say that)

i am determined to turn this around. i just wish i knew what it was that was making me feel so many sad things. It's not the kind of stuff that normal people normally dwell on. But here I am, nonetheless, dwelling on them. It's horrible and depressing. I mean, i am not depressed, but I feel like crying a lot, but can't...and I don't know... it's crazy. i know this sounds reclusive, but i hope we don't start spilling personal stuff at the meeting tonight. i don't think i would want to. but knowing me, i would start bawling if we did, then of course they wouldn't let me leave withOUT talking. urrgghh.

I need to start seeing my world in bright colors again. It was foggy out this morning, which totally fit my mood. I still have joy and hope in God, but I guess i have just been spending a lot of my time throughout the day NOT thinking about how awesome He is. I decided yesterday to REALLy limit how much secular music i listen to. not that my non-Christian music is bad, but some of the stuff i really like is very emotional or sad or "regretful," so it keeps me in a funk, cuz i will keep singing those songs in my head. i need to have praise stuck in my head. i hope that will help. i need something. well, let me reword that. I have something...it's God. i just need to reclaim the Joy that comes through Him.

grr....i just posted a crazy long post that was very personal....and the computer deleted it.
oh well.
i really don't feel like retyping all that.

that makes me sad.

goodbye bloggers.

Do you ever just look up at the sky and wonder what kind of things God thinks about? You know, like when He sees all the pain in the world, does He cry? there is supposed to be no sorrow in Heaven, but God weeps for His children... that is something interesting to think about.

I think the night sky is beautiful. It is full of wonder and is like one great masterpiece created by God. Like a dream, almost. You can just get lost in the sky. How can anyone see the beauty of it and not understand that some magnificent Creator designed all that?

I have been having a really awesome time getting more and more into the word of God, and spending more time thinking about Him throughout the day. Strange thing, though, usually when i go through times of increased awareness of God's presence in my life, it causes me to be filled with joy, like, ALL the time. but lately i have been feeling like crying Soooo much. When i am not with people, especially, and i am left alone with my thoughts. it just can get to be overwhelming.

Part of it may be hormonal right now, who knows, but the main reason is because i am so sensitive to other people's emotions. it is one of those qualities that is my greatest strength and greatest weakness. Good in that I can empathize with those people, but bad in that it weighs me down emotionally.



Sometimes life just gets crazy and you start to realize how many people there are with so many hurts, just aching for answers. For relief from their anxiety. I want to be really joyful right now. it's like it is inside of me, but i don't have the strength to pull it out. Every day has felt like a rainy day. I feel kind of bottled up, but i HATe that feeling, and so i try not to feel it. I don't know. I am crazy. I am tired when i get plenty of sleep, I am sad when I should be happy, and I am fighting crabbiness at the most easy-going times. This doesn't make any sense. A part of me understands it, but the rest of me is telling me to just Snap OUT of it.

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Desiree Nicole Morris
Birthday: June 14 1988
Birthplace: Hahn Air Force Base, Germany
Current Location: McKinney, Texas
Eye Color: kinda olive, but mostly brown
Hair Color: dark brown, almost blackish
Height: 5/9
Right Handed or Left Handed: right
Your Heritage: Dutch, Russian, English, Irish, German, etc.
The Shoes You Wore Today: sneakers, and slippers
Your Weakness: talking without thinking
Your Fears: honestly? never getting married, or never having kids
Your Perfect Pizza: cheese with chicken...no mushrooms or onions!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:lead LOTs of people to the Lord and make a difference politically somehow
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: hehe
Thoughts First Waking Up: I so don't want to get out of my nice, warm bed. Then when i realize i don't have a choice, i make the most of it.
Your Best Physical Feature: my eyes
Your Bedtime: midnight i guess?
Your Most Missed Memory: life in england
Pepsi or Coke: neither, coke, but i am cutting back
MacDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds....REAL chicken only!...and some fries with dat!
Single or Group Dates: for actual dates, i would like it to be single, or maybe with one close friend and their date. but i love group outings too!
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: i dont drink iced tea
Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate ... ooooohh yeahhhh!
Cappuccino or Coffee: I would like a Double Grande Mocha Frappuccino with Cream!
Do you Smoke: eww, Gross!
Do you Swear: Same answer
Do you Sing: shh!!! don't tell anyone! what? of COURSE i sing...i love to sing loud in my car when i am by myself and i can try to harmoniz but not care what i sound like
Do you Shower Daily: sometimes every other day, unless i smell...but i am NATURally clean...hehhe
Have you Been in Love: this'll sound funnY: sadly, yes
Do you want to go to College: hmm...already doin it...don't have much choice. but i LOVE college and see it as an opportunity to reach out to my generation! woohoo!
Do you want to get Married: YES
Do you belive in yourself: yes
Do you get Motion Sickness: only if i am tired and dazey and someone makes a weird turn or brakes funny

Do you think you are Attractive: sometimes...i would feel better about myself if my skin was clear...i HATE having to wear foundation every day
Are you a Health Freak: hmm...should be. i have a big sweet tooth tho, so...yeah. and i have recently rediscoverd my LOVE for Wetzels Pretzels...mmmm!
Do you get along with your Parents: yes. unless they are mad at me! : )
Do you like Thunderstorms: I like Arizona thunderstorms...they are BEAUTiful
Do you play an Instrument: i rock out on the air guitar!
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: y would i?
In the past month have you Smoked: again i ask, y would i?
In the past month have you been on : ??? on what?
In the past month have you gone on a Date: no
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: considering i work at the mall, it's hard to avoid it. but yes, i went to the mall recreationally with my BFF last weekend
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: aren't u supposed to eat the cookies, not the box? maybe i missed something
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: as in raw fish? hmm...let me think about that...
In the past month have you been on Stage: oh yes! you know i have a secret life as a stand-up comedian...i have at least twenty fans!...of course, they are all stuffed animals...but can't a girl have a fantasy life?
In the past month have you been Dumped: being dumped requires a boyfriend so NO
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: does the shower count??? haha, no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: i took an unusual amount of sauce packets from Taco Bell, but hey they are complimentary, right? : )
Ever been Drunk: hhahahhahaha....um...NOOOOOO!
Ever been called a Tease: no
Ever been Beaten up: no
Ever Shoplifted: no
How do you want to Die: i want to get raptured first.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: a dental hygienist, and then a mommy
What country would you most like to Visit: New zealand
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: blue
Favourite Hair Color: l. brown
Short or Long Hair: short, but with a little length
Height: let's put it this way...i don't want to look DOWN when kissing my husband
Weight: a healthy one
Best Clothing Style: no holes in shirts, can be casual, but enjoy dressing nice
Number of I have taken: ???
Number of CDs I own: too few for how much music i love!
Number of Piercings: i have 2, one on each ear
Number of Tattoos: I have NONE
Number of things in my Past I Regret: 1...yup, that about says it